Tuesday, April 1, 2008


Just so everyone knows why Ted won't speak to me when he comes home--I took the truck in to be cleaned today. I received a call that they will be charging me extra because it is so excessively messy. That along with not being able to put any of Ted's clothes away because his drawers are so full set me off. First of all--Ted has a closet full of clothing along with TWO large dressers full of clothing. So, for all of us wives (and possibly husbands also), here are the rules on clothing items:
1. If the pants have holes so large in the crotch that the boys might hang out--the pants need to be thrown out.
2. If the holes in the shirt armpits are so noticeable that individual hairs can be counted--toss it!
3. If the underwear is so thin that certain items can be counted--toss it!
4. If body lines are clearly visible in underwear--it is too thin--toss it!
5. If the shirt is so small that your belly button is visible--and that isnt' the intent--toss it! Please we don't need to see that.
6. If the neckline, arm line, or any other part is hanging by a thread--again toss it!
7. If nasty stains are not able to come out and you wouldn't wear the item in public--again toss it.
8. And last but not least--if the item of clothing shows anything that only your spouse or doctor should see--toss it! The general public does not need see it.

In addition to this, if paperwork is outdated--and the business no longer exists--please reevaluate the need to keep it. Like grocery store bonus cards--and the grocery store has been out of business for over 2 years! Also, change should not be left rolling around in multiple drawers--I found enough to possibly play for Alihan's ticket home (almost $900!).

So--just so everyone knows--I might need a couch to sleep on for a while. But there just comes a time!


Lisa said...

Ha ha ha ha! You know I've got your back JP. I use the toss it while he's gone and he'll never miss it approach as well. It works ;)

Hilary Marquis said...

Hmm...Tim is traveling way too much lately...Maybe I should start cleaning his office! He'd never leave again if I started "reorganziing" **hehehe* By the way, you and the kiddos are welcome to crash at my house anytime! The accomodations will include an air matress in the playroom downstairs, but I make a pretty good breakfast :)

Ivy Lee said...

Oh, I am all over cleaning up old clothes and tossing them out. If they are so old and have so many holes, the salvation army won't even accept them, then yep, time to go :)


R.I.P stinky butt shorts, transparent undies and swiss cheese shirts with stains! No more junk in the trunk on the loose!

janiece said...

Yes I am reading this and it won't be pretty. I was already having chest pains, but now my eye is blinking. The embassy officially took 2 minutes. "You're an old pro, sing here and hear....good luck!"